Love Is Blind’s Stephen Speaks Out After Sleep Test Incident (Exclusive)
Warning: this story contains spoilers from episodes 7-9 of Love Is Blind season 7.
Love Is Blind‘s Stephen Richardson is addressing the fallout from his sleep test incident, which ultimately ended things with fiancée Monica Davis.
In the latest batch of episodes from season 7 of the Netflix hit, fans were in for a shock as it was revealed that Stephen, 34, went off to do a sleep test one night, but ended up sexting another woman while there, despite being engaged to Monica, 37.
The emotional confrontation — which was particularly poignant as Stephen had previously admitted to doing something similar in a past relationship while in the pods with Monica — ultimately ended with Stephen apologizing for his actions, Monica breaking down in tears and the two breaking up.
“I can’t do anything to change this, I will live with this,” Stephen said before leaving their shared apartment. “I truly am sorry for hurting you, for wasting your time, for coming on the show and doing this to you. I shouldn’t have come on the show.”
Now, Stephen is speaking out to PEOPLE about the ordeal, admitting the biggest thing he learned from his time: “It is probably smart to put a password on your phone.”
“But in all seriousness, the main things are self-talk, self-reflection, and a lot of the things that I believe I said it in the pods, where it’s like you don’t know if you’re fully healed until your next relationship,” he continues. “And you see a lot of people talking about, ‘Well, you should have completed therapy before you entered this.’ And I’m always like, ‘Is therapy a completion? Do you complete therapy?’ No, it should be an ongoing thing because you’re always growing and learning and there are traumas that might’ve affected you that were never a problem until your thirties or forties.”
“And you might think that you had that under wraps and then suddenly you’re faced with something where you’re like, oh, okay, I see this, now that I recognize it,” he adds. “I need to do something to fix it. And that’s essentially what this whole year for me has been.”
During their confrontation at the end of episode 8, Stephen owned up to his wrongdoings, claiming he “didn’t pretend anything” and genuinely wanted to marry Monica.
“I did make a completely stupid mistake while being drunk at a sleep test with somebody who texted me,” he admitted. “I know that it was a stupid decision.”
Monica refused to accept his apology, insisting that he was texting that woman through the following day with “disgusting” messages about “fetishes” and other sexual topics. She also snapped at him when Stephen attempted to reason by saying he only texted her after “the conversation that we had last night.”
“Don’t you f—ing blame me at all for you being gross,” Monica stated before requesting Stephen Venmo her for the money she covered for him over the last few days. “I’m almost embarrassed about how much of my heart I’ve given you. You were gonna shake my dad’s hand this weekend? While you were planning on cheating? I don’t understand.”
Now that they’ve split, Stephen tells PEOPLE he’s used the moment as a learning experience for what he hopes for in future relationships — as well as what he doesn’t want to repeat.
“Not even just from my mistake, but the experiment of Love Is Blind, it really did show me that when you take everything else away from the world and it’s just you and an individual, it does truly only take 10 days to fall in love with someone,” he says. “I can confidently say no matter what, as a cynic that I fell in love with Monica within 10 days. I fell in love with her in those pods, 100%. There’s no doubt in my mind that I did. And it was easy because of the way that the experiment was set up for us.”
“And so taking that into account, I understand now a lot of the minutiae we go through with fighting a genuine feeling just because we’re like, ‘Oh, well, we’re supposed to wait this amount of time.’ Or other people say, ‘You shouldn’t do this on the first date or shouldn’t do that within a month,’ blah, blah, blah,” he continues. “It’s like, why don’t you just do what feels good and stop worrying about everything else and just enjoy your adventure within the relationship? Either it’s going to work out or it’s not.”
“You look at every season: they either work out or they don’t, but make the most of it,” he adds.
Stephen and Monica are the second season 7 couple to split after getting engaged in the pods. Leo and Brittany previously split shortly after getting out of the pods, though producers stopped following their story and did not capture their breakup.
Five other couples currently remain: Taylor and Garrett, Nick and Hannah, Marissa and Ramses, Tim and Alex, and Ashley and Tyler.
Never miss a story — sign up for PEOPLE’s free daily newsletter to stay up-to-date on the best of what PEOPLE has to offer, from celebrity news to compelling human interest stories.
Episodes 1-9 of Love Is Blind season 7 are now streaming on Netflix, and episodes 10-11 will drop Wednesday, Oct. 16.